Timeless Appeal: Confidence Inside and Out

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Timeless

When you realize you are walking royalty, you will begin to move and handle life differently. Allow me to help debunk a few of the biggest myths that prevent many from living their best life.

  1. “Two steps ahead”- Winning is when you run you own race. Only when you decide to blend in with everyone else does “competition” become a thing. In reality, “competition” is working backwards and a distraction that wastes emotions, energy, money, and time (the worst of all to waste). The fact of the matter is that you never needed to worry about someone outdoing you. They aren’t you.
  2. Expensive does not automatically equal good- A N52,000 T-shirt is still a T-shirt. A bright lipstick sold for N18,000 may prove to be a powerless purchase, no matter the cost. As shared in “The Winning Wardrobe”, your best colors will look gorgeous on you no matter the price point. Power is when you look like your most present self, being aware of and accepting what looks best on you. It also means to acknowledge the beauty of another person without feeling envious or depressed about it. Big fact: the thing you love about someone may be the exact thing they hate about themselves…and vice-versa.
  3. Class and elegance are both timeless and universal-and recognized immediately. From Swazi Princess Fikisiwe Dlamini to the lovely Tosin “OloriSuperGal” Ajibade, elegant women across the world have a special quality in common. They have a commanding wardrobe that greatly benefits them. See “To The Fifth Power” for more possibilities.
  4. In cultures around the planet, there is an undeniable pattern of beauty. Short or tall, royal people have a stately presence. Slouching is not likely! No matter the beauty regimen, each take pride in how they look. No matter your social status, your makeup choices should reflect your true self (see “Face Shapes” here and “Lovely Lash” here. For their culture, they represent the people and go above and beyond to do it well. To look less than elegant is a personal disservice, especially in a world that is heavily driven by sight. This is your first resume. Whether in the city or village, you can look lovely. It is possible.
  5. Going against your personal style leaves many floating questions, causing a greater likelihood of being taken for granted in many important areas of life. For the maturing woman, to dress like a teeny-bopper communicates a severe unawareness of self and likelihood to make poor decisions. (Read: “If she still thinks she’s a teen, can she really be taken seriously?”) Many people mistake trends for the modern look they really want to convey, but don’t know how to. The desire is to look current and youthful-but not childish. As I shared in “It’s All Chic to Me”, a great sign of maturity is a powerful wardrobe. Legendary actress Ajoke Silva is known for her talent and her enduring beauty, which is highlighted by status-appropriate choices.
  6. There is beauty in every heritage- If you don’t respect your culture, it is unrealistic to expect others to. To love another language but hate your own communicates low self-esteem and disrespect to yourself and your family. To say your features are ugly is to call your parents ugly. Appreciating your culture does not necessarily mean accepting everything about it. Where there are humans, there will be imperfections-in every location. However, people will be fascinated by your culture if you make the impact. Style star Ebuka is a prime example of appreciating your heritage and making it cool worldwide. His personal image keeps him on the style radar for others to see what he will wear next; as a result, more are inspired to dress similarly.
  7. Many often joke about others showing interest in African culture and miss the hidden gem: the clothing, food, and language you consider “common” is absolute treasure to someone else. Like this classic write-up from Ayoola Bandele, designer Shade Thomas took the beauty of African styles and developed a fashion brand that was truly ahead of its time. () Imagine if she dismissed it as “common”: her important mark on fashion would have no part of today’s fashion scene.
  8. There is honor in honest work, no matter the earnings- A fast and easy promotion meets an even faster, and harder, fall. Try to ignore anyone who condemns your work if you are trying to earn an honest living and use a positive skill. A puff-puff hawker who reads this magazine (yes, we love our food industry family, too!) may not earn much, but can dream big with new ideas and, in dressing up every day, set themselves apart from the other sellers and become a key business for commuters. Avoid dismissing dreams as impossible; anything can happen, so try to make it good!
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