The pressure to perform can often come at the cost of our wellbeing. Omotola Ade-Onojobi, a certified Emotional Intelligence Coach and Psychotherapist, has dedicated her career to helping individuals and organizations thrive with clarity, empathy, and confidence.
From her early days teaching etiquette to children, to founding TrueEnvy Academy and TheComplete360Woman, Omotola has seen first hand how awareness, emotional intelligence, and practical strategies can transform lives.
In this interview, she shares her journey, insights into burnout, and practical ways to cultivate balance, resilience, and fulfilment in both personal and professional life:
What led you into emotional intelligence coaching and therapy?
I was first an etiquette coach, more like an etiquette tutor for children. What led me into all this is my passion for children, for the next generation. I used to go to different schools to teach children etiquette, poise, and all that. While studying etiquette, I wanted to understand more about behaviour.
One day, in my research on children’s behaviour and what it means to be well-mannered, I discovered emotional intelligence. I had read about the theory of it years ago. I started teaching children, simplifying it for them. That’s really how I found emotional intelligence.
By 2020, I discovered emotional intelligence in a practical sense. I began with self-awareness coaching because that was the journey I was on myself. Everything I teach as an emotional intelligence coach is something I have mastered personally. I’ve been through it myself, so I understand the practicalities, not just the theory.
For a while, I was an emotional intelligence coach, a self-awareness coach, and then I fully studied emotional intelligence coaching as a course. That’s how I became a certified emotional intelligence coach.
The therapy part came later. When I started coaching people, I realized I needed to be more than a coach. So I studied to become a certified psychotherapist, and that’s it.
I’ve loved my journey so far, and a lot of people have been my clients with many success stories.
After working with so many professionals, what’s one common challenge you see people struggle with?
One major challenge many of my clients face is marital issues. For professionals, it often goes deeper. It’s often about connecting with their minds, understanding who they really are, and building a positive self-construct. Many people struggle with their personal identity, self-esteem, self-efficacy, confidence, and self-concept. They don’t know how to navigate these elements, and it affects multiple areas of their lives.
You see people who are functional in their careers or businesses, they work hard and achieve a lot but they aren’t fulfilled. Similarly, many married clients find their relationships shaky and don’t know how to address the underlying issues.
Ultimately, it comes down to mental health and mindset. Many struggle to shift from thinking, ‘I can’t do this’ or ‘I can’t heal from past traumas,’ to realizing, ‘I know who I am, regardless of life’s challenges, and I will work on myself to become a better version of who I am.
How did TrueEnvy Academy start, and what problem were you trying to solve?
TrueEnvy Academy has been part of my work for over a decade. It actually started from my time as an etiquette tutor for children, visiting different schools to teach manners and poise. Over time, the work expanded to training teachers as well, and the academy evolved alongside my own growth.
I have a background in business, with a BSc in Business Administration, majoring in Human Resource Management. After school, I became a certified project management professional and trained in customer service, gaining practical experience as a Consumer Service Representative (CSR) for two years. Later, discovering emotional intelligence led me to become a certified coach, and I further trained professionally in human resource management, focusing on learning and development (L&D), which became my passion. I also took courses in brand and advanced management, which strengthened my expertise in marketing and HR consulting.
TrueEnvy Academy is a reflection of my continuous learning. It evolves as I grow in skills and knowledge. We have trained more than ten organizations across industries, including beauty, education, tech, and fintech.
The core problem we aim to solve is talent inadequacy. Many organizations struggle with a lack of skilled, motivated, and productive employees. Often, talent is underappreciated, under-rewarded, or unclear about how to maximize productivity, which directly impacts profitability. TrueEnvy Academy helps organizations build capacity, enabling people to find fulfilment in their roles, work more effectively, and ultimately increase organizational performance and profitability.
You work a lot with burnout. What does burnout usually look like in people before they even realise it?
Burnout often starts subtly. Most people don’t even recognize it, they just notice the symptoms. They may feel overwhelmed, disconnected, or say things like, ‘I feel like I don’t love my children or my spouse the way I used to,’ or, ‘Everything is so foggy; I don’t know what I’m doing anymore.’ They may struggle to concentrate, forget things, or feel exhausted even after sleeping.
Some report being snappy or irritable with their loved ones, and later feel guilty about it. These are all signals of burnout. Common symptoms include constant fatigue, lack of motivation, boredom, and a sense of being underwhelmed. People may feel unfocused, unclear, or disengaged from life. Over time, they may gradually withdraw, lose interest in social activities, and even edge toward depression.
There’s also a side of burnout that many don’t notice: functional burnout. These people keep performing, they work hard, socialize, laugh, and appear productive, but internally, they are exhausted and overwhelmed. They push through each day, hoping someone will notice or hear them, often realizing only when they come across a post, community, or coach like me that they need support.
My work involves helping individuals and organizations recognize these signs early, putting systems in place through emotional intelligence to prevent burnout from escalating into depression or clinical burnout. It’s about identifying the hidden signals and supporting people before it becomes overwhelming.
What are some small, practical ways people can improve how they handle stress and emotions at work?
First, I always tell people that stress starts at the very beginning of the day. When you wake up, take a moment to name your emotions; identify how you’re feeling and why. Understanding your emotions helps you manage them. A lot of stress comes from what we tell ourselves before the day even starts. For example, people say, ‘Lagos is hectic,’ and of course it will feel hectic if that’s your mindset. For me, even when I encounter traffic, I leave home believing the day will work out. That mindset makes a difference.
Another way to manage stress is to pause before reacting. Instead of immediately responding to a question or situation, take a moment to breathe and think. This allows you to respond clearly, calmly, and intentionally, rather than react impulsively.
Time management is also key. A lot of stress comes from trying to do too much at once. My favourite approach is the Pomodoro Technique. I write down tasks for the week, not just the day, so I don’t pressure myself. I call it my ‘TADA list’. If I don’t complete everything in one day, it’s fine. This helps me give myself grace while still making progress.
It’s also important to track your stressors. Identify what or who triggers you, and be mindful of those patterns. Establish boundaries, know what you can’t accept and communicate it. Boundaries protect your emotional balance.
Finally, be kind to yourself. Take time off when you need it, rest, recharge, and ask for help when necessary. Many people struggle because they don’t ask for support, but seeking help is essential for managing stress and emotions at work. These steps have helped me personally, and I’ve seen them work for many others too.
What inspired you to create TheComplete360Woman community?
There are two sides to the story. The first is that I’ve seen women struggle and I’ve been there myself. I’ve navigated motherhood, in-laws, relationships where a partner wasn’t emotionally available, and the challenge of wanting more from myself but not knowing how to bring it out. I’ve worked on financial stability, tried to grow personally and professionally, and experienced all the overwhelm that comes with it.
When I started my journey into self-awareness and emotional intelligence, I realized it’s a solution to so many of life’s challenges. If you build emotional intelligence, you can ‘hack’ your life and you can be as successful and fulfiled as you want. I wanted to take as many women as possible on this journey with me. The concept of TheComplete360Woman reflects this: a woman finding completeness and fulfilment in every aspect of her life, genuinely happy and thriving through emotional intelligence.
The second part of the story is spiritual. I had been running a women’s platform called Spice of Life, with monthly themes and activities. At the start of 2021, during my prayers for the new year, I felt strongly that the focus should be on liberating the minds of women. I shared this vision with my husband and decided to start with a virtual event, just as a beginning. That first event grew, and over the years, the community has expanded bigger and better.
What inspires me most is seeing women evolve, because women shape society. We are raising the next generation. When a woman is fulfiled, grounded, and living a life of completeness, she can instil values and character in children from a place of love rather than trauma or bitterness. That is the heart of TheComplete360Woman. Helping women grow, so that society can grow with them.
In your experience, what really helps people move from feeling stuck to feeling more in control of their lives?
In my experience, the first thing that helps people move from feeling stuck is awareness; awareness of what is stopping them in the first place. When you understand what’s keeping you from moving forward, you gain perspective, knowledge, and exposure. Awareness helps people recognize that they are not in a good space, which is the first step toward change.
The next step is inquisitiveness: the curiosity to ask questions, to understand why they are in that situation, and what they can do to improve. It’s this questioning that opens the door to solutions.
Finally, it’s willingness and readiness. People need the willingness to engage, to seek advice, and to explore resources. Readiness is what allows them to act on those insights, to take steps toward change. Awareness, inquisitiveness, and willingness together create the foundation for people to move from feeling stuck to feeling more in control of their lives.
What does a healthy balance between wellbeing and performance actually look like in real life?
For me, a healthy balance starts with proper time management and knowing your priorities. I use the Eisenhower Matrix to organize tasks into what is very important, urgent, less important, or not important at all. The most urgent tasks get my immediate attention. Tasks that are less urgent or less important I delegate or outsource, like cleaning, cooking, or other chores, so I can focus on work, productivity, and my wellbeing without burning out.
Another key is picking your battles. You don’t have to respond to everyone or everything. Decide what matters to you, and let the rest go. This simple step can reduce unnecessary stress and allow you to thrive.
Equally important is being compassionate to yourself. Prioritize rest, know when to take breaks, and give yourself grace. Balance is about knowing when to undo pressure and recharge, so you can continue performing at work while maintaining emotional and mental wellbeing.
When these practices come together; managing priorities, setting boundaries, and resting, you start thriving. You’re happier, more focused, and able to perform without compromising your wellbeing.
Omotola’s insights are a reminder that true success is not just about professional achievement, but also about self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and the ability to balance performance with wellbeing.
Through TrueEnvy Academy, her coaching, and TheComplete360Woman community, she empowers individuals to recognize hidden challenges, build resilience, and step into lives filled with purpose and fulfilment. Her journey is proof that transformation begins with awareness, is strengthened by curiosity, and is sustained by a willingness to grow; lessons that apply to both work and life beyond it.
Written by Olowolayemo Aliyah
